Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Hough to sing at Indy

Julianne Hough, Dancing with the Stars broad, will sing the national anthem at this year's Indy 500. Hough, who certainly did not have sex with Stars partner Helio Castroneves, will play opening-act for Jim Nabors who returns for prerace ceremonies after a one-year hiatus.

This "sporting star-romantic interest at game" ploy has been done with varying outcomes in the stick and ball world, but this is a first for motorsports. By Hough merely attending the 500, ripple effects would be felt by Castroneves. But she is preforming. Karma is nothing to be trifled with in the sporting world, and this has the makings of a large, well, trifle. Using two classic stick and ball examples, it's clear that Castroneves will not escape the young lass's song unscathed.

Hough's presence will impact Castroneves in one of two ways:



Tony Romo-Jessica Simpson syndrome will set in, causing Castroneves, distraught at the sight of his quasi-lover, to have a pace lap meltdown similar to this:









The mainstream media creamed over Romo's inability to preform under pressure with his GF in game attendance. Castroneves fans should hope this form of retardation does not befall their dancing inclined racing driver. You may even wish to urge Hough to stay home. We recommend sending her a MySpace message, to deliver your words of angst.

The flip side of the coin leads to sweet success and ultimate triumph.



The Josh Beckett-Danielle Peck syndrome will elevate Castroneves to new levels of performance, all but securing his victory in the Great Race. (This is a more obscure example that stems from the 2007 ALCS when the Cleveland Indians brought an ex-flame of Red Sox's pitcher Josh Beckett to sing the national anthem. The unfazed Beckett threw a gem).



You've got two choices son, the easy way or the Hough way. Hope it works for you Helio.

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