Perhaps no kick in the junk is quite as fierce and swift as those delivered by ticket-writing law enforcement personnel. Aside from sucking, speeding fines are largely unwarranted when dispensed and do nothing but further the plight of the middle class through monetary penalties that this dismal economy cannot support. It short, speeding tickets are as un-American as Vermont or buffets that are not all-you-can-eat. The guys at Jalopnik have amassed a list of ten ways to avoid the dreaded speeding ticket, even after you have been pulled over by those damned Texas County Mounties.
Our favorite? #10:
But everybody poops. When the traffic cop suggests you hand over your info, make sure to bounce around with a pained look on your face. When the officer asks you what's going on just mention that you just had some greasy Thai food and you just have to beat the Lard Na home.
That should probably be #2 on the list. /Takes a bow and exits.
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